Yesterday, when we were driving round in your car,
And you kept saying things like
“If you don’t like me anymore, just tell me,”
Or “if you don’t love me anymore, let me know,”
I fucking died inside.
I never want you to doubt my love.
You are the most important thing in my life
And I wouldn’t trade you for the world.
If you no longer want me, or cease to love me,
I am so sorry for driving you to lose those feelings.
I need you in my life, even if you decide you want another
Or at least no longer want me.
We had a good night after we made up,
But I’ve thought a lot about what you said yesterday
And I’ve been crying on the bathroom floor for the past 3 hours.
It’s much too early to be up, but I woke up and couldn’t fall asleep again.
I kept imagining how I would feel if you left me
And I felt so sick that I had to rush to the toilet to be ill.
All couples fight, but it’s worse for me because I know it’d be my fault if you gave up.
I don’t like feeling as if I’ve let you down or that I’m a disappointment or failure.
I want to be your everything, your happiness, because you’re mine.
Please forgive me for perhaps not being your dream girl.
Our fight is over, and the morning after, I feel awful.
I know you love me and I love you so damn much, too.
But the thought of you growing to hate me makes me feel nauseated.