I cannot keep you from the world,

I can’t ask you to unfriend certain people.

But your best friend is a girl

And she is prettier than me.

I have never met her,

Or heard you talk about her,

But you have both tagged each other

With the title “bestie” in posts on Facebook.

There’s a world full of girls out there,

Who may be better looking or better in bed

Or who you might just like better.

I hate the thought of you leaving me.

I know you wouldn’t cheat on me,

But my insecurities can’t ignore the fact

That some of your female friends

Are so much hotter and cooler than me.

I cannot help getting jealous

When I see how close or happy you are

With some of them,

When I look like a potato

And have the personality to match.